I have three problems.

First of all, my powered mirrors don't work. I couldn't find a fuse that said anything about mirrors, so I checked all my fuses and they're all good.

Also, one of the little lights that shines down on the gauges isn't working... there's two, one with the wires going to it o the left, and one by itself on the right. The one on the left doesn't work but the one on the right does. The bulb itself looks ok??

Also, a few of the backlights, such as the rear defroster backlight and cruise control button backlight, don't work, or when I beat on the dash they come on sometimes... wtf? I pulled the dash apart and looked at the backs of the buttons and checked everything but everything checks out.

I don't get it? This car has been giving me wierd electrical problems from the beginning. I did notice that whoever had the car had a lot of amp wiring in the trunk... I wonder if he had some violent subs that vibrated all the bulbs so much it ****ed them up.

 

You'll have to take the instrument cluster out to replace the bulbs - if you have to hit them to bring them on, that just means they're on their last legs.
As far as the mirrors are concerned, you're gonna have to pull the switch out and check you have 12 volts coming to it (not sure which terminal to check) If not, you're gonna have to look for a bad connection at the fuse box or a shorted wire. If you have 12 volts, check if you're getting the same voltage at the mirrors.
If they are aftermarket, the previous owner might have just installed manual adjust mirrors - so bear that in mind as well!