Jokes
#1
08-10-2009, 01:00 PM
Jokes
So...a lady stalls out in front of my house the other day in her rimmed up white altima. I went outside to see what the problem was. I asked her to start the car. The engine almost jumps out of the car to run away. Every mount in the car was bad. I noticed some heavy white smoke coming from the engine. I asked her how long it was like that for. She said for a while....but she usually put oil in when that happen....okaaaaaay.
So I checked the water in the radiator....good. Oil level...WTF!!!!NOTHIN'
So she kept trying to start it. I told her she might not want to do that because she might possibly have a blown head gasket. So she tells me her boyfriend is a mechanic. So I said okay....I'll wait till he comes to tell him what was going on. Guy pulls up....he jumps in and tries to start it. His Girlfriend blurts out...."Maybe because the car is on a slant on this hill, gas may not be getting to the engine!" I laughed to myself...but here's the joke the crazy *** boyfriend agreed. I was like WTF!!! I am going to remember him to make sure never go to his place for service.
So I checked the water in the radiator....good. Oil level...WTF!!!!NOTHIN'
So she kept trying to start it. I told her she might not want to do that because she might possibly have a blown head gasket. So she tells me her boyfriend is a mechanic. So I said okay....I'll wait till he comes to tell him what was going on. Guy pulls up....he jumps in and tries to start it. His Girlfriend blurts out...."Maybe because the car is on a slant on this hill, gas may not be getting to the engine!" I laughed to myself...but here's the joke the crazy *** boyfriend agreed. I was like WTF!!! I am going to remember him to make sure never go to his place for service.
#3
08-10-2009, 03:37 PM
95% of girls = dumb.
Had a friend sell a girl a 95ish Tallon AWD Turbo. A few weeks later I notice the car back in his driveway. I pull up and ask wtf. Turns out the girl sold it back to him for $600 < after buying for 4G>. She was running it hard, and never checked the oil. Ran it dry.
We fixed it for a few hundred. Was great. =)
Had a friend sell a girl a 95ish Tallon AWD Turbo. A few weeks later I notice the car back in his driveway. I pull up and ask wtf. Turns out the girl sold it back to him for $600 < after buying for 4G>. She was running it hard, and never checked the oil. Ran it dry.
We fixed it for a few hundred. Was great. =)
#4
08-10-2009, 05:16 PM
Haha...that must be one of the worst mechanics...I took two years in highschool and seem to know more than that guy about cars heh...I cant stop thinking of how bad his shop must be...Definately don't take it there...
#6
08-19-2009, 01:55 AM
Got this from another forum. My heart goes out to the guy. I wish him peace especially in this emotionally trying and difficult time of the year:
"So lately my wife has been working alot of late shifts, and for the past couple of months she has been carpooling with a male co-worker. At first I didnt mind in case she has car trouble or something like that, but it seems they have become a little bit more than friends. You know the scenario, the phone calls that hang up, she starts wearing nice clothes to work and talking about him all the time then abruptly stops leaving an uncomfortable silence.
If im out in the garage when she gets home (usually after midnight) he just drops her off and leaves, but if the lights are off in the garage and I'm in the house (they think Im sleeping) they sit out in the car for like twenty minutes.
I asked her once what they were doing, and she said
"Just talking" ....whatever. So last night I decided to see whats really going on out there. So I leave the garage door open ,and turn off all the lights.
About the time she usually gets home, I go out in the garage and wait.. In a few minutes, his car pulls into my driveway,and Im hiding behind my Lancer. When his headlights shine through my garage and onto the car, I see something that I just couldn't believe. The rear camber is severely wearing my rear tires. Now I have to get an alignment. Should I go with -1.5 with 1/32" toe out or just leave the toe at 0? "
"So lately my wife has been working alot of late shifts, and for the past couple of months she has been carpooling with a male co-worker. At first I didnt mind in case she has car trouble or something like that, but it seems they have become a little bit more than friends. You know the scenario, the phone calls that hang up, she starts wearing nice clothes to work and talking about him all the time then abruptly stops leaving an uncomfortable silence.
If im out in the garage when she gets home (usually after midnight) he just drops her off and leaves, but if the lights are off in the garage and I'm in the house (they think Im sleeping) they sit out in the car for like twenty minutes.
I asked her once what they were doing, and she said
"Just talking" ....whatever. So last night I decided to see whats really going on out there. So I leave the garage door open ,and turn off all the lights.
About the time she usually gets home, I go out in the garage and wait.. In a few minutes, his car pulls into my driveway,and Im hiding behind my Lancer. When his headlights shine through my garage and onto the car, I see something that I just couldn't believe. The rear camber is severely wearing my rear tires. Now I have to get an alignment. Should I go with -1.5 with 1/32" toe out or just leave the toe at 0? "
#7
08-19-2009, 10:22 PM
#8
08-20-2009, 09:21 PM
Got this from another forum. My heart goes out to the guy. I wish him peace especially in this emotionally trying and difficult time of the year:
"So lately my wife has been working alot of late shifts, and for the past couple of months she has been carpooling with a male co-worker. At first I didnt mind in case she has car trouble or something like that, but it seems they have become a little bit more than friends. You know the scenario, the phone calls that hang up, she starts wearing nice clothes to work and talking about him all the time then abruptly stops leaving an uncomfortable silence.
If im out in the garage when she gets home (usually after midnight) he just drops her off and leaves, but if the lights are off in the garage and I'm in the house (they think Im sleeping) they sit out in the car for like twenty minutes.
I asked her once what they were doing, and she said
"Just talking" ....whatever. So last night I decided to see whats really going on out there. So I leave the garage door open ,and turn off all the lights.
About the time she usually gets home, I go out in the garage and wait.. In a few minutes, his car pulls into my driveway,and Im hiding behind my Lancer. When his headlights shine through my garage and onto the car, I see something that I just couldn't believe. The rear camber is severely wearing my rear tires. Now I have to get an alignment. Should I go with -1.5 with 1/32" toe out or just leave the toe at 0? "
"So lately my wife has been working alot of late shifts, and for the past couple of months she has been carpooling with a male co-worker. At first I didnt mind in case she has car trouble or something like that, but it seems they have become a little bit more than friends. You know the scenario, the phone calls that hang up, she starts wearing nice clothes to work and talking about him all the time then abruptly stops leaving an uncomfortable silence.
If im out in the garage when she gets home (usually after midnight) he just drops her off and leaves, but if the lights are off in the garage and I'm in the house (they think Im sleeping) they sit out in the car for like twenty minutes.
I asked her once what they were doing, and she said
"Just talking" ....whatever. So last night I decided to see whats really going on out there. So I leave the garage door open ,and turn off all the lights.
About the time she usually gets home, I go out in the garage and wait.. In a few minutes, his car pulls into my driveway,and Im hiding behind my Lancer. When his headlights shine through my garage and onto the car, I see something that I just couldn't believe. The rear camber is severely wearing my rear tires. Now I have to get an alignment. Should I go with -1.5 with 1/32" toe out or just leave the toe at 0? "
WTF WTF WTF lol all the new members have random links in their sigs!!!
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